(at The Cat’s Meow)

APOLLO

I might get a refill.

JUDE

I can make it for you!

VAL

You are on medical leave.

JUDE

(grumpily) You’re not in charge of me.

ESTEE

They kind of are.

APOLLO

They super are.

JUDE

Is no one here on my side!?

APOLLO

Not when your side involves you potentially hurting yourself in an attempt to make me some tea.

JUDE

How would I hurt myself making tea?

APOLLO

You’d find a way.

JUDE

(laughing) Hey!

NEVAEH

‘Scuse me, Sydney, hot tea coming through.

SYDNEY

Ooh, for me?

NEVAEH

No, for Apollo.

SYDNEY

Ableism strikes again.

NEVAEH

You’re so dramatic. 🙄

PATRICK

Ableism is a serious problem in today’s society, Nevaeh. Disabled people are treated as second-class citizens.

SYDNEY

God, this guy rocks.

NEVAEH

You’re perfect for each other.

SYDNEY

(flustered) Wha- Hey! That’s not-

PATRICK

You’re right, we would make the perfect disability advocacy team!

SYDNEY

(fondly) God, he’s so stupid.

PATRICK

Huh?

SYDNEY

Nothing. You didn’t hear anything.

PATRICK

Oh, okay!

MARIANGEL

Hey, Nevaeh, can I have another pepsi-coffee, please?

SYDNEY

And I’ll take some chamomile tea.

ESTEE

Just a water for me!

NEVAEH

Are any of you assholes actually going to pay?

ESTEE

For water? 🥺

NEVAEH

Not you.

VAL

(sigh) I’ll cover it.

(Sydney and Mariangel cheer)

MARIANGEL

So, how’s the campaign prep going?

VAL

Nevaeh? You want to answer that?

NEVAEH

It’s going well! Val is helping me with the specifics, making sure I have all the documentation I need to run for governor.

MARIANGEL

How does all that work with a criminal record-

SYDNEY

You mean the one she doesn’t have?

VAL

It’s part of the revised treaty deal.

MARIANGEL

Which you’ve already signed, right?

VAL

Yes, all of us have.

ESTEE

The city’s going to be a lot more peaceful now.

NEVAEH

I wouldn’t count on it. New villains are sure to rise up, and I haven’t had contact with Absolute Zero for days.

APOLLO

Jude? You okay?

JUDE

Huh? Oh, yeah.

APOLLO

(gently) Are you sure?

JUDE

Yeah. I just… I’m happy. I’m really, really grateful to have all of you in my life.

SYDNEY

Wow, that’s gay.

MARIANGEL

Hush!

JUDE

(laughs) Yeah, yeah. It just… It feels like a dream, almost. Like, I’m dating my long-time crush and he’s literally renouncing villainy for me. Most of the major villains in my city are agreeing to either step down or switch sides. All of my friends are safe and happy, and I get to be here with them. It feels…

APOLLO

(softly) Good?

JUDE

Yeah. Good.

MARIANGEL

D’awww.

ESTEE

That’s very sweet, Jude.

NEVAEH

You’re right, it’s… nice. It’s new, but it’s nice.

JUDE

I think you’ll make a great governor.

APOLLO

Politics is just villainy with extra steps.

JUDE

Of course you would say that.

APOLLO

I call it like I see it.

JUDE

You should come over tonight.

SYDNEY

(spit-takes) Right in front of my tea!?

JUDE

Not like that! I just- Lucy misses you. And I want to spend time with you. And my house is boring and empty and lonely, and I’m not allowed to work or patrol, so-

APOLLO

I’ll come over, love. It would be my pleasure.

JUDE

Thanks, Apollo.

APOLLO

Anything for Lucy.

JUDE

(laughs) Right, of course.

ESTEE

You two are cute together. I wouldn’t have pegged you as a match before, but… looking back? It was bashert. You’re meant for each other.

APOLLO

I like to think so.

VAL

Anyway, I should probably get back to the tower. Damage-control over the gala is still ongoing.

APOLLO

Sorry.

VAL

We’ve already sorted that part out, Apollo. You’re making up for it by becoming a hero, for real this time. And working without pay for the first few months.

APOLLO

Nevaeh recently came into 10,000 dollars anyway.

VAL

(annoyed) I am aware.

NEVAEH

Who said I was paying your share of rent?

APOLLO

I don’t have a share of rent, dumbass.

NEVAEH

(fake threatening) Maybe you should.

APOLLO

Don’t make me remind you why I shouldn’t. Jude gifted me a book titled 1,001 Cat Facts yesterday.

NEVAEH

I take it back. You don’t have to pay rent.

APOLLO

That’s what I thought.

MARIANGEL

Oh, to have siblings!

NEVAEH

Oh, to be an only child.

VAL

(chuckles) Goodbye, everyone. Thank you for the drinks, Nevaeh.

NEVAEH

Anytime.

REPORTER

(muffled) This just in, an up-and-coming villain is attacking a line of shops uptown, they seem to be headed for The Cat’s Meow next- Where are the heroes!?

APOLLO

No rest for the wicked.

NEVAEH

Plenty of rest for you and Jude, actually. Let us handle this.

APOLLO

Being hurt sucks.

JUDE

At least we’re hurt together! Wanna hide out in the back room while they fight?

APOLLO

Yeah, let’s go.

(fight sounds kick up and then fade out as Apollo and Jude walk away into the employee room)

APOLLO

…Thanks for fake dating me, Jude. And then real-dating me. Um. It- I… like it. A lot. Being with you, that is.

JUDE

I like it a lot, too, Apollo. I love you, you know?

APOLLO

Oh, I know. You know I love you, too?

JUDE

Of course I do.

NEVAEH

(muffled) AND DON’T COME BACK!

APOLLO

Sounds like they figured things out.

JUDE

Heh, yeah. Ready to face the world again?

APOLLO

With you? Always.

THE END.